Thursday, April 8, 2010

I am in a serious funk. Well, not like SERIOUS serious, just serious.

I have battled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. It hit it's peak after Ethan was born and then when I broke my foot when he was 4 months old, I hit what I would consider "rock bottom". I was one of THOSE patients...the crazy ones. We'll spare the details, but since that day, I have been on some sort of anti-depressant/anti-anxiety medication.

I had to try out numerous different types until I found one that was right for me. My issue is anxiety, mostly at night. My doctor has also implied that I have some OCD, but my OCD comes in the form of obsessing about morbid thoughts of things that could happen to my children. OBSESSING. And also becoming obsessed with the thought of my house burning down whenever I leave, so I end up unplugging random things and double, triple, quadruple checking to make sure the dryer was off and the iron was unplugged and upright.

I finally found the perfect pill for me and I have been on it for the last 3 years, with the exception of being pregnant with Allison. It was worked so well for me.

These last few weeks, though, even though I am still taking my medication, I have been crabby, irritable, stressed, and tense. My patience is super thin. I don't know what the deal is! I need to snap out of it, though, because I know my kids can sense it, and that's not fair to them. I am hoping to get some time to get out and go for walks, because it seems to help my attitude. I am also going to hope that work isn't so crazy, but that is totally wishful thinking...

Think good thoughts!

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