Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I had one patient teach me how to kill myself with a knife without making a big mess (not even kidding, and neither was he) and another who was seriously upset that I write on my hand often at work. Don't you know that the ink is soaking into my skin and filling my body with toxins???

I love my job.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Jay goes back to work on Monday and I have to say, I will miss him. I was spoiled ROTTEN these past 5 weeks. I slept in nearly every day, he'd make me a dinner before I had to go to work, and he got a TON done around the house. He's a good guy. He is always doing stuff for me, but even more so when I am pregnant. It's sweet. Here are are some typical Jay-isms from the past couple days:

Me: I get so dizzy when I am standing for long periods of time. It's such a bad pregnancy symptom
Jay: Nah, it's just cause your body isn't used to being vertical for so long

Me: I wish Ethan would eat breakfast, but then again, I never eat breakfast, either
Jay: Yes you do. It's just considered lunch for most people.

I definitely feel the baby move now. It's an amazing feeling. It's like a swirling sensation. I don't feel any pokes or jabs (yet!) but I know he or she is just rolling all around.

Since my job is so fast-paced and busy, I sometimes have a hard time when I'm there. I get short of breath really easy (something about progesterone does that???) and I'll get lightheaded. I also frequently just feel sore and achy. I think I adapt to it fine, and if I start to feel bad, I just slow down for a little while until I feel okay again. I always feel so much better knowing that all my crazy movements at work are likely lulling my baby to sleep and at night when I'm in bed, I love knowing that the sound of my heartbeat is something my baby finds comfort in.

Last night when I got home from work, I went to check on Ethan and he woke up and asked me to lay with him. He never opened his eyes but he told me he missed me when I was at work. I rubbed his legs and snuggled real close to him. I studied his perfect little profile and realized that there really will be another little human being that I will be head over heels in love with like I am with Ethan and it really amazes me. I always tell myself that I could never love anyone like I love Ethan, but I do!

At this rate, this baby will be nameless. We don't really have any boy names that we both LOVE, although we do both kind of like Adam. We want the middle name to be Jack, after Jay's Grandpa, and I don't think Adam Jack flows real well. Jay has always loved the name Abby for a girl, and I have loved the name Allison. I have no strong feelings towards Abby, and Jay has no strong feelings towards Allison, so I think both those names are out. I mentioned using the middle name Jaye for a girl, obviously after her daddy, and Jay just melted at that idea. He loves it. We both like the name Lindsey, but I don't like how Lindsey Jaye sounds. I can think of lots of sweet nicknames for Lindsey, which is why I like it. I think it goes well with Ethan, too.

I don't know!!! I don't think we'll have a decision until this baby is born, to be honest. We had a really hard time with Ethan's name and since we KNEW he was a boy, by referring to him as Ethan instead of "the baby" when I was pregnant, it helped the name grow on us a ton. This time around, we won't be able to do it. I'm open to suggestions! I don't like anything too trendy and "out there". No weird spellings or anything like that.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

I had my 15 week appointment this week and it was SO disappointing. I had some questions for her and she was so rushy. Normally she'll ask me some questions, then I'll ask her some questions, and then she'll find the heartbeat. This time she came in, said my urine and blood pressure was good, and asked me to lay down! She did question my lack of weight gain so far (2 pounds) but when I assured her that I am definitely eating, she was cool with it. I was supposed to get the penta screen done, but they couldn't get a good vein on me (typical). I ended up calling the day after my appointment and asking if I could get a prescription to have it done at the hospital I work at. I'm surprised she was oaky with that. So I had that done and I should have those results back next week. I also was thinking I may be anemic so she did a CBC. Everything was normal except my hematocrit was low. I think in pregnancy, low hematocrit is normal (it was just a little bit low).My nausea is GONE, thank God! I still gag when I brush my teeth and certain smells bother me, but for the most part, I feel fine. I am still tired a lot and sometimes it feels like my muscles are just exhausted (one of the things that made me think anemia). I also have been getting short of breath really easy, but after playing around on the internet, I learned that it's likely due to progesterone and it's totally normal and safe to me and the baby.

Something that kind of concerns me is that when I am at work, towards the end of my shift, my abdomen HURTS. It doesn't SEEM like contraction pain (it's constant), but I don't know what it is. And I really only notice it at work. My husband is insisting I stop lifting both Ethan and patients (which I have been lately) so hopefully it's just ligament stretching. I WILL mention it at my next appt. regardless of how much of a hurry she is in.

Next appointment is April 13, along with my ultrasound. Yay!

Pshh librarians ruin all the fun!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

So with the passing of Jay's Grandma, Ethan has been full of questions.

Ethan: Momma? Why did Granny have to die?

Me: Because she was really old, her body was tired.

Ethan: Is she still in her bed?

Me: She's in Heaven

Ethan: Where is Heaven?

Me: It's wayyyyyyyyy high up in the sky. Past the clouds.

Ethan: If she walks around in Heaven, won't she fall through the clouds? There are spaces between the clouds. She could fall through them.

Me: Heaven is past the clouds. She is very safe there.

Ethan: Did she want to go there?

Me: Of course, everyone wants to go to Heaven.

Ethan: So when is she coming back? Is she back now?

Me: No, she's not coming back. When you go to Heaven, you stay in Heaven.

Ethan: But what if she wants to come back?

Me: She doesn't want to come back. She is very happy in Heaven. Everyone is happy in Heaven. And she can still see you and everyone else she loves. She just does it differently now.

Ethan: How are we going to see her tomorrow, then?

Me: We are just going to see her body. She won't be doing anything. She won't move, she won't be breathing like you and me, and she won't talk. We will just walk up to see her one more time and say good-bye.

Ethan: Buuuuuuut isn't she supposed to be in Heaven?

Me: When you die, your body doesn't go to Heaven. Just your heart. The parts of you that make you special. You know how I always tell you that you have a good heart even when you act up? The special part of Granny went to Heaven. She doesn't need her body any more because God gave her a new one.

Ethan: Is she an angel?

Me: Maybe. I don't really know. No one knows until you go there. But me and you won't be going there for a loooooooooooong time.

Ethan: Can you scratch my back? It's really itchy.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Four has been the best age so far. Okay, more specifically, 4 1/2. Ethan has us laughing all day long. We both just have so much fun with him! He's doing wonderful in school, he has lots of friends, and his imagination is out of this world. He loves making up new games. He still has his moments, like when he'll say "I am never ever never gonna look at anything ever again!" Uh, okay!

Just thought I'd let you know :)