Monday, August 30, 2010

All my life I have wanted to be the mother to a girl. When I found out Ethan was a boy, I will admit, I was a little sad, but that night I went shopping and bought my first baby boy clothes fir him, and from that point on, I was so excited about him. When he was born, he was my only child for 4 years and I just felt such a strong sense of closeness with him. He was my BABY! I was so worried about having another baby because I didn't want anything or anyone to interfere with the love I have for my child. It was a bit extreme, yes, but it was how I felt.

When the pregnancy test read "pregnant" on Christmas day 2008, the first words out of my mouth were "it's a girl!" I even bought little girl clothes before we knew her gender, I was THAT certain. Sure enough, my sweet Allison Jay will be turning 1 on August 31. Happy birthday to my little dream come true.

I love my kids so passionately. They both complete me in ways that only they can. They are my life. The worries I had about raising a boy vanished when I saw my sweet boys face. The worries I had of Ethan feeling left out or alone when Allison was born vanished when I saw just how much he adores her and still to this day goes out of his way to protect her.

I have really great kids. We are going through a struggle right now, but I truly feel in my heart that we are on the right track right now. My kids come first so if there is something I need to do, I will do it if it means I will strengthen the connection with them.

I love you to the moon and back, Ethan and Allison. I am proud to be your mom. You complete our family in more ways than one and I am so excited to see what the future holds for all of us.


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